Okay Boomer

I had an argument with a friend of mine on Facebook last week about cops and protests.

It's a touchy topic of course. She posted someone's Twitter comment about cops who are behaving well during these protests being like abusive boyfriends who briefly act nice and then abuse you again later. My response was that I disagreed because I feel like you have to accept an effort in the right direction. She (a fellow librarian) said there was "significant evidence" that cops who had been friendly to protesters were gassing them later in the evening and I said I wanted to see her evidence because I had looked for evidence myself and wasn't able to find any. But she seemed to misinterpret me and responded with information about police officers and domestic violence and abusive behavior.

I tried to clarify. I said the evidence I was asking about was the evidence she said she had for the exact same cops who were being friendly turning around and being aggressive. But she continued to be outraged that I had challenged her. She said I had suggested her personal experience as a victim of abuse is not adequate evidence of cops' bad behavior. The whole conversation ran off the rails. I kept trying to bring it back to the original issue of the current protests, but she just got more outraged. She said I had been "rude" (which I thought was strange).

This is not somebody that I know only on Facebook. This is a friend. In fact, I had offered to let her stay at my house a couple of years ago when she thought she was going to lose her apartment. This is someone I thought I had a relationship with. I was shocked at how determined she was to misunderstand me.

It got me thinking of another FB argument with a person the same age: 30 year old. They have a huge chip on their shoulder about "Boomers." The argument I had with the other person devolved into "you don't understand what it's like for my generation." I feel like that's the response of both of them and it kind of annoys me because they ignore the histories of people older than they are.

I didn't appear on this planet as a middle aged woman living in the suburbs. I have a whole life history neither one of them know anything about. By the time I was their age, I was a  military veteran. I've been on a human rights commission. I fought for women's rights and gay rights. I was at the March for Women's Lives in DC in 1986 and the gay rights march in 1993. And I was in the gallery of the NJ legislature when they became the 3rd state to recognize gay marriage. I've participated from a very early age in community building and trying to make the world better. Not slacktivism, not liking posts on Facebook. On the ground work.

I know it's typical for young people to dismiss older people and for older people to dismiss younger people, but these are people I know personally - I expect more consideration from them. It's very noticeable that their demand for understanding, sympathy, and tolerance includes none for me. I'm very disappointed in this most recent interaction, especially since she blocked me.

Her loss.