Days of Awe

Went to a terrific program at the temple tonight in honor of selichot, a special service involving poems and the recitation of Psalm 145 (celebrating God's omniscience) which is supposed to begin at midnight. Traditionally, selichot is followed by an all-night Torah study session. One of the reconstructionist temples in Philadelphia had a fun event on this night, but I never went, and I've always blown off this gateway to the Days of Awe.

So this year, the new rabbi at Concord arranged for a super cool program to precede the service, with a panel of 3 psychologists addressing the issue of repentence. The audience was very involved and the conversation was lively. I really enjoyed it, but it made it more clear to me how ambivalent I am about the High Holidays this year. I feel weighed down by the loss of Noah. I had been thinking that participating in these ancient ceremonies would be a balm, but the closer it gets, the sadder and more distracted I feel.